TEOTWAWKI and Zombies

Wollychop · Post by **Wollychop** » 12 Sep 2008, 19:32

1/5 of jack? You need a handle of captain morgan. I've spent quite a bit of time there.

Although, I'm halfway through my first bottle for the weekend heheh... The wife working nights has its "side effects" hahaha

Post by **Esteves** » 12 Sep 2008, 20:00

Would you like a pickled pecker with that pic?

Post by **MrSlippyFist** » 12 Sep 2008, 20:20

Captain. That was college days drink. I need the stronger shit now.

skoltuniak · Post by **skoltuniak** » 12 Sep 2008, 20:34

Start practicing!

http://www.zombietargets.net" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Wollychop · Post by **Wollychop** » 12 Sep 2008, 20:36

A zombie war would definitely be a time to drink, and imagine what even a bottle of some cheep liqour could go for!

Post by **Esteves** » 12 Sep 2008, 23:03

skoltuniak wrote:Start practicing!

http://www.zombietargets.net" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Good find!

EARS · Post by **EARS** » 13 Sep 2008, 05:46

I've seen some very hard nips before, but never that hard! Interesting, very interesting! Does cause the mind to think.

Post by **Cyberfly** » 13 Sep 2008, 09:17

How does a zombie fake an orgasm? (a fag will just throw a tablespoon of warm yougurt on your back)

And you know this...HOW?! :huh:

EARS · Post by **EARS** » 13 Sep 2008, 11:49

I didn't have the ...../nerve to ask, but I was wondering.

Post by **jmz5** » 13 Sep 2008, 13:19

First hand experience?

/I couldn't help myself :lmao:

Post by **Cyberfly** » 13 Sep 2008, 23:11

I'm not so sure I really want to know. I mean, now that I really think about it, giving or receiving, neither option is a good one, so...let's just forget I asked. Mmm-kay? :huh:

Llagoud · Post by **Llagoud** » 14 Sep 2008, 05:17

I don't know how the heck I missed this release. Robert Englund, Jenna Jameson.....

A Zomedy/Horror

Zombie Strippers! 2008

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0960890/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

stateofbliss · Post by **stateofbliss** » 14 Sep 2008, 11:46

No one seems to have any comments on vegetarian zombies?

Shirley, they cun't be all meet eaters... sorry, auto correctness turned off...

Post by **Rapier1772** » 22 Nov 2008, 19:40

Wollychop · Post by **Wollychop** » 22 Nov 2008, 20:47

:lmao:

I like that!

LK45s · Post by **LK45s** » 22 Nov 2008, 22:20

:lmao: Is that the minimum daily recommended serving?

Llagoud · Post by **Llagoud** » 23 Nov 2008, 04:30

Post by **f3rr37** » 23 Nov 2008, 09:02

:laugh: Love it.

Post by **Cyberfly** » 23 Nov 2008, 09:12

:lmao: :lmao:
I gotta send that one out!

Post by **Esteves** » 28 Nov 2008, 13:48

Not an endorsement... (see below.)

http://www.zombiecombatclub.com/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

These guys seem to recommend melee, which I personally feel is a good way to get yourself undead.

Llagoud · Post by **Llagoud** » 04 Dec 2008, 05:13

From about 1:00 am Tuesday till noon yesterday I thought I had the Solaris virus and was turning.
Trembling chills only relieved by hot flashes that left me drenched in sweat, followed by more shivering chills.
My innards liquified and were shooting out both ends.
I slept 20 of each 24 hours only waking to spew.

Turns out to be food poisoning, the first I've had in about 12 years. (The last time was Taco Bell, funny how everyone can name what got them and when...it's that bad)

Most likely culprit; a bag of (improperly) roasted almonds from the farm store.

I'm thinking of bagging the remaining almonds in 10-20 packs and selling them as a '48 hr Rock Hard Abs' program.

Back in the land of the Living now.

Post by **jmz5** » 04 Dec 2008, 05:57

I had food poisoning once, I would have welcomed death after the first day.

Post by **Rapier1772** » 04 Dec 2008, 06:11

Llagoud wrote:funny how everyone can name what got them and when...it's that bad

My experience was courtesy of the Harley Davidson Cafe in Las Vegas. The drive home the next day SUCKED! I dont think I even qualified as a zombie for a couple of days

Llagoud · Post by **Llagoud** » 04 Dec 2008, 06:15

I can't even imagine trying to drive Tuesday. I couldn't have made it down the stairs.
I cancelled my appointments and turned off the phone.
Biggest bummer is I missed the call-back from Ruger to schedule pick up my LCP

Post by **jmz5** » 04 Dec 2008, 06:24

That stinks, I have my return package, I just need to send mine back.

Post by **Cyberfly** » 04 Dec 2008, 06:27

Plenty of thoughts, but no official comments.
I'll only say that 'food poisoning truly sucks'. Been there, done that, don't wanna do it again.

Post by **panzermk2** » 05 Dec 2008, 15:42

Llagoud wrote:
Turns out to be food poisoning, the first I've had in about 12 years.

I get it like that about every three months.

Post by **MrSlippyFist** » 05 Dec 2008, 15:47

Never had food poisoning. Got a bad stomach bug in the sand box and everything went thru me for about a month - lost 25 pounds in 3 weeks. But didn't really feel sick. Luckily that was in the winter and I wasn't sweating much or I would have died.

Llagoud · Post by **Llagoud** » 05 Dec 2008, 17:43

Just sayin'.......during a solaris outbreak, before 'curing' friends or neighbors....be sure they didn't just get a bad stromboli (Mamma Mia's, Miami, December 1995)

Post by **Rapier1772** » 05 Dec 2008, 18:44

Wait for 'em to start saying "brrraaaaiiinnnns...."

Post by **panzermk2** » 05 Dec 2008, 21:23

Nope i am shooting as soon as they are in sight, you can never be to careful.

Post by **Rapier1772** » 04 Feb 2009, 16:01

They're here!!!! http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090204/ap_ ... ns_zombies" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Pranksters in at least three states are messing with electronic road signs... putting drivers on notice about Nazi zombies and raptors...
Collinsville, Ill... hackers changed a sign along southbound Interstate 255 to read, "DAILY LANE CLOSURES DUE TO ZOMBIES."
signs in Austin, Texas, recently flashed: "NAZI ZOMBIES! RUN!!!" and "ZOMBIES IN AREA! RUN."
Indiana's Hamilton County, the electronic message warned drivers of "RAPTORS AHEAD — CAUTION."

Post by **f3rr37** » 04 Feb 2009, 16:02

I've thought about trying that before, but no signs in my area

Wollychop · Post by **Wollychop** » 04 Feb 2009, 16:06

:laugh: As funny as that is, can you imagine some of the problems you could cause?

"Road closed ahead, turn around" alone would create some disorder...

Hmmm... Things to remember when anarchy descends...

Post by **MrSlippyFist** » 04 Feb 2009, 16:12

All those zombies in Texas must have starved....

/looking for brains.

Post by **Esteves** » 04 Feb 2009, 16:14

:lmao:

Post by **jmz5** » 04 Feb 2009, 16:16

:lmao: :lmao:

Post by **Rapier1772** » 04 Feb 2009, 16:18

MrSlippyFist wrote:All those zombies in Texas must have starved....
/looking for brains.

:lmao: :lmao: :clap:

Post by **Grantness** » 04 Feb 2009, 16:54

Coincidentily in California, all the Zombies starved as well after discovering that everyone had actually already been dead for 5 years when they came to eat their brains. Turns out all that botox, cocaine, and vitamin water kept 'em up, moving, and wrinkle-free post-mortem.

Post by **MrSlippyFist** » 04 Feb 2009, 17:08

Grantness wrote:Turns out all that botox, cocaine, viagra and vitamin water kept 'em up, moving, and wrinkle-free post-mortem.

FTFY

Rodentman · Post by **Rodentman** » 04 Feb 2009, 17:25

Pretty funny!

I thought these were pretty good...

Post by **Grantness** » 04 Feb 2009, 19:45

Nice one Slip :lmao:

Llagoud · Post by **Llagoud** » 05 Feb 2009, 03:40

:lmao: nice prank!

Wollychop wrote:Hmmm... Things to remember when anarchy descends...

Remember most of those have solar charged battery packs too.....at TEOTWAWKI, I'll be like Cool Hand Luke with a pipe cutter.....but dropping (and collecting) PV panels instead of parking meters.

Post by **MrSlippyFist** » 11 Feb 2009, 09:00

Don't worry - Chuck Norris will take care of those zombies:

http://cbs13.com/local/highway.sign.hac ... 31731.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Post by **f3rr37** » 11 Feb 2009, 09:45

:laugh: Get 'em Chuck!

User42 · Post by **User42** » 16 Feb 2009, 14:31

Random internet find, I think it belongs here as well. :laugh:

Post by **f3rr37** » 16 Feb 2009, 14:37

:laugh:

Post by **Rapier1772** » 16 Feb 2009, 17:27

:lmao:

Post by **jmz5** » 16 Feb 2009, 19:08

:laugh:

Post by **Cyberfly** » 16 Feb 2009, 19:36

I like that.
In fact, I think I want a shirt with that on it... :thumb:

downtrodden · Post by **downtrodden** » 17 Feb 2009, 03:14

Nice....

BTW, all the discussion i've seen here pertains to the slow moving variety of zombies, have any of you even considered what if "rage" infected zombies attacked!?

Personally, Melee isn't even an option. Kill the zombies at standoff distance, if you let some get close enough to grab you- do everyone a favor and eat a bullet.

BTW, what do you guys keep in your "Oh-Sh!t-Gotta-Go!" bag?

Wollychop · Post by **Wollychop** » 17 Feb 2009, 06:50

I don't think that "rage" zombies are actually zombies, since they are actually still alive. Presents a whole different set of rules.

I operate on the canon of Max Brooks books, personally.

Post by **Cyberfly** » 17 Feb 2009, 07:41

I think that 'Go-Bag' contents should constitute a whole new thread... :ponder:

Post by **f3rr37** » 17 Feb 2009, 09:42

Cyberfly wrote:I think that 'Go-Bag' contents should constitute a whole new thread... :ponder:

I agree.

War_Wagon · Post by **War_Wagon** » 17 Feb 2009, 11:23

The Official Zombie survival guide for the zombie holocaust... Buy it, Read it, Learn it, SURVIVE IT!!!

I used all caps because it is that important. Very useful tidbits of info that you never would have thought of, anyone who has read it, you know what I am talking about... the motorcycle, eh? eh?

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1400049628

turless · Post by **turless** » 23 Feb 2009, 18:38

Medula Oblongata wrote:Zombie Haiku

Robin was on my hood
She was trying to eat my brain
Hit a tree, she's toast

Hiding in a dumpster
Back alley's aren't so safe it seems
Week old cheese really stinks

I shot him in the head
He didn't seem to notice
Must be a liberal

Went to the market
My shotgun and rifle in hand
Hope to see my ex...

Running for my life
Zombies closely following me
IRS could learn from them

I ate my neigbor
He wasn't very tender
Didn't taste like chicken

Cat went for a walk
She came back ugly and cold
Pussy ain't always good

:lmao: great hiku

Post by **panzermk2** » 23 Feb 2009, 18:54

classic!

Grouse · Post by **Grouse** » 25 Feb 2009, 18:05

I solved it. I Have 25 ninjas upstairs for personal defense, and 50 Pirates down stairs for preemtive fodder.

After scotty beams up my family I am out a here

Post by **panzermk2** » 25 Feb 2009, 18:37

I like your plan!

Post by **Cyberfly** » 26 Feb 2009, 14:10

I saw this written on the inside of a bathroom stall somewhere...can't remember where now. It went, "Don't beam me up now, Scotty! I'm taking a shi...
:lmao:

Wollychop · Post by **Wollychop** » 01 Mar 2009, 19:51

They'll teach ANYTHING in college :laugh:

http://www2.colum.edu/course_descriptions/52-2725J.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Wollychop · Post by **Wollychop** » 02 Mar 2009, 08:07

Im guessing English 101 or 201. That's usually the way it is for courses like that.

stg2ahn · Post by **stg2ahn** » 02 Mar 2009, 08:19

This fancy college has a special accreditation it is called "UNACCREDITED"

Wollychop · Post by **Wollychop** » 02 Mar 2009, 08:36

Sure it is.

Accreditation

Columbia College Chicago is accredited at the graduate and undergraduate levels by The Higher Learning Commission of the North Central Association of Colleges and Schools. Columbia is accredited as a teacher training institution by the Illinois State Board of Education.

Not that the status means anything. Most colleges and universities are chock full of useless courses designed to keep useless people employed.

Post by **Cyberfly** » 02 Mar 2009, 09:47

I don't want to learn how zombies became famous in Hollywood, I want to learn how to distinguish them from your standard Congress-Critter so I don't get 25-life by accidentally dropping a standing member of Congress in a SHTF situation...

Post by **Rapier1772** » 18 Jul 2009, 19:49

How to become a zombie:

Post by **MrSlippyFist** » 18 Jul 2009, 20:52

HAHHA Yeah, I saw that the other day. Genius.

Post by **Cyberfly** » 19 Jul 2009, 10:01

Jess was at the bookstore a couple weeks back and stumbled across 'The Zombie Survival Guide'. She laughed so hard she almost wet herself. She thinks its hilarious that we even discuss this stuff.
She bought it for me.

One of my boys who rarely ever picks up a book started reading it and I almost had to beat him up to get it from him...

I may have to give it to him when I'm done.
I'm surprised...it's actually pretty well written.

Mister Freeze · Post by **Mister Freeze** » 19 Jul 2009, 11:49

what's the 411 on the Zombie book? I'd like a copy...

Llagoud · Post by **Llagoud** » 19 Jul 2009, 17:01

:lmao: Great shirt!

Zombie Survival Guide is a hoot, World War Z is on my list to add to the stack.

Mister Freeze · Post by **Mister Freeze** » 19 Jul 2009, 18:57

Can Zombies see white lite, or shoud I get filters?

toyslr · Post by **toyslr** » 19 Jul 2009, 19:01

signal aircraft with that thing?? :laugh:

Mister Freeze · Post by **Mister Freeze** » 20 Jul 2009, 03:33

Only with muzzle flash!

Post by **panzermk2** » 21 Jul 2009, 18:06

toyslr wrote:signal aircraft with that thing?? :laugh:

No shit, looks cool though.

Wollychop · Post by **Wollychop** » 21 Jul 2009, 18:08

Is that a unimax in front of the sight in the first pic?

Mister Freeze · Post by **Mister Freeze** » 21 Jul 2009, 18:16

yep. With the lights, good from the hip

Wollychop · Post by **Wollychop** » 21 Jul 2009, 18:22

Damn :laugh: I certainly wouldn't want to be on the business end of that thing!

A drum on that and you've got a definite combat multiplier ...

Shaokhano · Post by **Shaokhano** » 22 Jul 2009, 12:10

facebook

Zombie Survival Guide Quiz
http://apps.facebook.com/qthe-zombie-su ... cebook.com" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

I scored Zombie Hunter

Post by **Rapier1772** » 22 Jul 2009, 12:19

That's mean! Zombies ~~are~~ were people too! :laugh:

Post by **f3rr37** » 22 Jul 2009, 13:04

Please develop something for humans.... please oh please.... :laugh:

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,534 ... latestnews" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Researchers Use 'Decapitating' Flies to Create 'Zombie' Fire Ants

Texas researchers across the state are finding a solution to fire ants and it is coming from South America.

The Phorid fly is a parasitic breed that finds its host in fire ants. This breed is nicknamed the "decapitating fly" for its effect on its host, and its host is nicknamed the "zombie fire ant."

"The current studies are the results of Don Henne, a Ph.D. student from LSU," said Robert Puckett, assistant research scientist at the Texas A&M AgriLife Research and Extension Center for Urban and Structural Entomology. "With what he determined, we have been releasing these flies into the U.S. in hopes of suppressing fire ant populations."

There are more than 20 species of the Phorid fly, but four are being studied. There are approximately 7 million acres of Texas where the flies are being released and observed.

The female fly is capable of laying 30 to 35 eggs, one egg per ant. Each egg is injected into the thorax of a fire ant worker.

As the larva develops inside the ant, it gradually moves into the head of the fire ant, secreting enzymes that dissolve the connecting tissues of the head and thorax.

This causes the fire ant's head to fall off, thus appropriating the nickname "the decapitating fly."

"As the larva is consuming the ant from the inside, the ant slowly loses its body functions," said Paul Nester, a program specialist for Texas AgriLife Extension Service. "Thus you can say it is the living dead, aka zombie."

The ant continues to attempt normal ant life but the larva presence hinders performance until the ant's body fails completely, which takes anywhere from 10 days to two weeks, Nester said.

"This is not the silver bullet since the multiple queen fire ant colonies can have between 100,000 to 500,000 workers," said Kimberly Scholfield, a program specialist for Texas AgriLife Extension Service. "However, the fly makes the fire ant go into a panic mode so that it forgets to look for food and takes cover instead."
Related Stories

The panic experienced by a fire ant in the presence of a phorid fly costs the colony food and keeps other fire ants from being alerted.

Many people ask about the danger of the flies instead of the fire ants, Puckett said.

"In fact, I have never seen a fly unless I was attracting it to something," he said. "They don't congregate like gnats, they appear to be nectar feeders so they are not attracted to decaying organic matter [such as maggots]."

The "decapitating fly" and "zombie ant" are not threatening species, Nester said.

"They are not anything to fear, they are not magical, they do not cause more damage, they are not genetically modified to be more ferocious," Nester said. "[The nickname 'zombie ant'] is just a name given to a fire ant that is slowly dying, and its actions are not typical of the way a healthy fire ant acts."

Puckett, Nester and Schofield said the phorid flies are one of the most promising biocontrol strategies available, and will hopefully prove useful in reducing fire ant populations.

"It will take time to see results, and it's not a rapid, fast solution," Puckett said. "But for every fly you know, there was an ant killed in result, and if you can shut down the foraging efficiency by introducing these flies, then this will allow the native ant assemblages to compete with fire ants."

This story originally appeared in The Battalion at Texas A&M University.

Post by **Rapier1772** » 04 Sep 2009, 17:15

Zombie Flu is killer

Whichever they are infected with, aim for the head!

Post by **Cyberfly** » 04 Sep 2009, 19:06

I'm blowing that one up to poster size and mounting it on the living room wall.
Er,...with Mrs. Fly's permission of course!

Llagoud · Post by **Llagoud** » 05 Sep 2009, 01:53

:laugh: same here!

Nice find, and thanks for bumping the thread up, I was going to post in it today......
'Zombie Strippers' finally made it to the top of my netflix queue and arrived yesterday.

It's horrible, just the way I like em.

I chuckled at the zombie stripper whipping out the old ping-pong ball trick and guffawed when she stepped it up to billiard balls.

Post by **Rapier1772** » 05 Sep 2009, 03:49

Llagoud wrote: 'Zombie Strippers' finally made it to the top of my netflix queue and arrived yesterday.
It's horrible, just the way I like em.
I chuckled at the zombie stripper whipping out the old ping-pong ball trick and guffawed when she stepped it up to billiard balls.

I was wondering if that flick was any good or so bad that it was good :laugh:

Post by **panzermk2** » 05 Sep 2009, 14:49

Cool

Post by **Rapier1772** » 05 Sep 2009, 15:08

Awwwww, isn't he cute?

Nice zombie ant :laugh:

Post by **panzermk2** » 05 Sep 2009, 20:43

Don't f@ck with mother nature. She will get you.

Llagoud · Post by **Llagoud** » 30 Sep 2009, 02:40

5 Reasons You Secretly Want a Zombie Apocalypse

All right, somebody needs to explain the zombie thing. It's not just movies and video games, there is something else going on. There's a Zombie Survival Wiki and a Zombie Preparedness Initiative. Then you've got the Zombie Squad's forum on zombie biology and another one on zombie combat tactics. Here's an index of 80 threads from the "All Things Zombie" forums on various zombie survival tactics.

It's gone beyond good fun. It's not just a mere obsession. These people are actually preparing for a zombie apocalypse. So why is everyone so eager for a world devoid of life, but full of the undead?

We think we have an idea.............

http://www.cracked.com/article/136_5-re ... pocalypse/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

#2.Acting Like a Dick, Without Consequence :lmao:

Wollychop · Post by **Wollychop** » 30 Sep 2009, 04:56

<pic removed>

:lmao:

Post by **Cyberfly** » 30 Sep 2009, 08:12

Maybe its the frustration level we feel with our government?? The need to kill something that LOOKS human?

Post by **Rapier1772** » 30 Sep 2009, 12:39

I just think we've earned it. We need a bit of hell on earth - just to get of the good for nothing a$$holes & freeloaders

Post by **Cyberfly** » 30 Sep 2009, 12:56

Think about it...most politicians ARE zombies...they just don't shuffle around mumbling, 'braiiinnzz' and oozing puss.
They need a high velocity lead injection to the brain. :ponder:

t1210 · Post by **t1210** » 01 Oct 2009, 05:32

They're suffering from a mineral deficiency. A lack of lead and copper in thier diet. This can be cure by an injection of said minerials to the back of the cranial cavity. :guns:

Post by **Esteves** » 01 Oct 2009, 18:28

So my crazy wife has recently started worrying about TEOTWAWKI in 2012 and planet X and blah blah blah. For once, I'm the optimistic one.

She wants solar panels and battery storage so that we'll have juice when the grid fritzes out, a rain harvesting system and bulk water storage, bulk gas storage, and a 2 year supply of food. She wants her own shotgun, and thinks we don't have enough ammo.

Which all sounds like fun, until the zombies come knocking - then the fun really starts.

Post by **f3rr37** » 01 Oct 2009, 18:35

:laugh: You've trained her right!

Time to convince her you need a moat!

Post by **Grantness** » 01 Oct 2009, 19:01

Has no one mentioned this yet?

Post by **f3rr37** » 01 Oct 2009, 19:03

Comes out tomorrow I believe, I want to see it! :laugh:

Wollychop · Post by **Wollychop** » 01 Oct 2009, 19:13

I'm gonna see it. Actually, I had to pretend that I wasn't sure about it and my "boss" had to "talk me into it". :laugh:

romer522 · Post by **romer522** » 01 Oct 2009, 20:57

Esteves wrote:So my crazy wife has recently started worrying about TEOTWAWKI in 2012 and planet X and blah blah blah. For once, I'm the optimistic one.

She wants solar panels and battery storage so that we'll have juice when the grid fritzes out, a rain harvesting system and bulk water storage, bulk gas storage, and a 2 year supply of food. She wants her own shotgun, and thinks we don't have enough ammo.

Which all sounds like fun, until the zombies come knocking - then the fun really starts.

Crazy? Take it while you can get it :thumb: :monkey: :monkey:

Llagoud · Post by **Llagoud** » 02 Oct 2009, 00:32

Has no one mentioned this yet?

I'm going to try and schedule a long lunch today and catch the matinee

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